Schofield Watches has announced the winner of its Last DLC competition that offered the final example of its limited edition Signalman DLC as a prize.
Competition entrants needed to compose a piece of prose based around the letters ‘DLC’ in order to be considered for the prize with a retail price of more than £4,000.
Entering under the pseudonym, Mr C, the winner submitted a piece entitled ‘Devilish Literary Competition’, featured below, using only words beginning with D, L or C.
Schofield Watches will post the best examples of entries on its social media outlets in the coming weeks.
Devilish Literary Competition
Darius loved Clara dearly, left Chichester December last. Caught direct Londonbound carriage. Digested lunch.
Clara didn’t love chaste Darius. London consumed daring little Clara’s dreams: literature, cocktails, decadence. Lithe Clara distantly lusted celebrity desperado Lord Carbury’s downright libidinous consideration.
Dusk’s low crepuscule. Diabolical Lord Carbury deftly left chambers, discreetly loaded calash: dismembered lover’s corpse! Drove. Located cellar, dumped luckless concubine, Drury Lane. Carbury dialled Liberal Club. Demanded libation. Concocted disinformation.
Leaving Clapham, Darius looked contemplative. Disembarked locomotive carrying diamond-laden coffret (devotion! Lucky Clara!) Delicate legs cantered down Lavender Crescent, discovered lodgings calamitously deserted.
Landlady confessed, “Darling little Clara departed late cockcrow.”
“Damn!” loverboy chided, “Destination learned?”
Chambermaid: “Deepest London! Central. Dinner, Lord Carbury’s”
Darius lifted chronometer (DLC, doubtlessly), “last chance!” Dashed Londonward, clutching diamonds…
Lord Carbury’s dwellings. Luxurious claret decanted, laudanum covertly dissolved. Laughing Carbury decreed loudly, “Cheers! Drink lots!”
Clara demurred, “Lord Carbury, does love conquer despondency? Like Colette declares: le camerade, désir?”
Lord Carbury disregarded literature (consumed depraved lithographs, chiefly), deigned, “Lovely Clara, does love conquer dyspepsia? Ludicrous! Chateau D’yquem? Let’s clarify. Drink! Lap! Consume!”
Doomed, loyal Clara drank loaded chalice, distinctly lightheaded, collapsed. Dastardly Lord considered deflowering, lauded countenance.
“Desist! Licentious coward,” Darius launched cudgel, damaging lounge casement. Dart landed, cutting distended Lord’s chest.
“Drat!” Lord cried, drew lustrous cutlass, despatched lethal charge. Darius lifted chronometer: defensive lifesaving case deflected lashing cutlass. Dagger leaped Carbury’s direction. Lord clutched deflated lungs. Certain death.
Listless Clara dribbled, lifted charming digit. Liberator conferred diamonds. Lovers clinched.
Days later, Chichester downs, local church. Devoted loving couple declared legal concord. Delighted local clan danced. Love consummated directly.
Lesson: carry DLC, don’t let cads distract love’s course.